Wisdom and Experience

So much I want to say

and I wish you could hear me

Wish you could read my mind

understand and keep the key

 

I shut myself off from my desires

because they will only betray me

So many things kindle my fire

and it always ends on the same thing

 

I test your loyalties with these half truths

you tell on yourself so I can trust you

safety in the silence I learned from youth

try to tell you myself but I don’t know how to

 

these moments blossoms with possibilities

I can love you and you can accept me

but my memories are my disabilities

try to break free but they won’t let me be

 

I thought I was strong

but I am just stubborn

Thought you could prove me wrong

but it is too late to unlearn

 

I am not stupid

and I am not lazy

I don’t believe in cupid

or that some hero will save me

I am my own heroin

I just get lonely

but if let you in

if only if only

 

I am not coward

and this isn’t fear

I am too cautious

I still wish you were here

your outspoken words

your endearing scent

the love I have heard

the time I have spent

 

I want to be brave

I want to be reckless

Shut off this brain

and tear off this dress

I am yours

I am undone

If you just look at my sores

it hurts because you are the only one

you crawl under my skin

you steal my words

you hold the panic in

and sooth the what hurts

you know what I know

you have been there done that

you laugh and let go

and that’s something I have never had

you don’t say I’m cute

you say I am intimidating

Some would say its rude

but I think its invigorating

your fingers get stuck in my hair

you stare into my eyes

I want to keep you here

where this wonder lies

where possibility is just imagination

where your lips are my lifeline

where the rules are in sublimation

and touches are feelings so easy to define

here you are mine

here I can keep you

when we leave there is a line

I can no longer reach you

And I like it like this

your sweet half truths make it interesting

All the pain I risk

Just for a moment of your kissing

I don’t mean a thing

I don’t count

expect for the pleasure I bring

which comes without doubt

 

You stare at me

as I stare at you

you don’t want to care for me

just like I can’t bare to care for you

 

It a thin ice to skate

and such ecstasy to feel

we both grew up in hate

and we both know dreams aren’t real

 

Only pain is right

and suffering is home

but your eyes are alight

and we aren’t alone

we aren’t alone.

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